Bringing vs Going
I had conferenced my brother, father and I on a phone call to celebrate my dad’s birthday. During the conversation my upcoming visit to my folks with my niece came up. I mentioned I was bringing my niece to see my folks. My brother didn’t like my saying this. He felt bringing implied I was taking her, versus saying I was going with her which would put us more as equals.
Uh, she’s six years old. (Sorry, 6 ½ according to my niece). I was bringing her.
I was responsible for her. If I was simply going I wouldn’t have to deal with what would happen if she had to use the bathroom while at the airport. Or more likely if I had to use the bathroom.
If we were going as equals I wouldn’t be on the Starbucks line to purchase a muffin standing backwards so I could see her at every moment.
If we were going as equals she would have bought me the Polly Pocket dolls at the Disney store in the airport instead of the other way around.
Bringing. Going.
Two different words.
I probably made more of a deal with it since my brother brought it up. With others, I might have not noticed the difference.
Then again we all use words where we think we know what it means only to find out the other person meant something different.
One exercise I do in my workshops with managers involves identifying what words we use all the time mean to them.
I have them write down words such as always, sometimes, occasionally, frequently & never. I then have them write down a number, from 0 to 100%, on when someone says the specific word what percentage did they mean.
I always get different percentages and I have never gotten everyone to say 100% for always or 0 for never!
Words have different meanings and beliefs for all of us.
When I recognize this to be true:
• I am more careful with words I use
• I ask questions of others to make sure I do understand what they mean
• My communication with others is clearer.
This is when I recognize this to be true. At other times I don’t do this.
I still say I brought my niece to see my folks. The week had its challenges as well as moments I’ll always treasure.
So I did bring my niece. But I’m going to remember the adventure.