The expression win-win often refers to situations where one benefits, not necessarily through someone else’s loss.  It’s a term used when dealing with group dynamics, as well as in the Thomas/Kilmann Conflict Profile, and in mathematical game theory.

It was also the name of a 2011 film, which got pretty good reviews, although I never saw it or heard of it until writing this article!

However, the true win-win for managers is when we work less to get our employees more productive.

Is this possible?

Yes!

How?

When we ask them questions and listen to what they say.  Instead of telling them what to do, we ask them how they think they should do it.

There are times, where you will need to tell them.  Approximately 25% of the time it will be appropriate to tell your employee.  In these circumstances your employee would probably appreciate what you tell them.

But then there is the other 75% of the time.  Telling them would not be the best approach.  Additionally it can increase our own stress level if we are telling them over and over again, without getting the desired results.

If we didn’t tell them, but instead asked questions – questions where they come up with the answer, or in turn ask you different questions – it will lead to them having a better awareness of the situation.

When we ask our employees instead of telling them:

• A dialogue is created where the employee can give their input
• It allows the process to be done differently than the way we think it should be done
• The employee gets more vested in the work

Being more vested gives them more responsibility and ownership into what needs to get done.   You support them with what they need.  You don’t have to figure it all out, they will.

And that’s a win-win!

This is a question many attendees of my management workshops ask.  It’s an admirable trait these managers have, albeit they might want their employees to be happy because they think this will help them get their work done!

However, the question is one which causes many managers stress because they don’t know the answer.

Making someone happy falls under the category of motivation.  And often we think what motivates us motivates them.  We then try to figure out actions which would motivate our employees, which could then make them happy.  But often it doesn’t work.

What motivates you doesn’t necessarily motivate someone else.

What makes you happy doesn’t necessarily make them happy.

There is an easier way to find out the answer to the question how do you make everyone on your team happy?

Observe them.  Ask them.  Listen to them!

Watch your employee’s actions when doing a task.  Talk/ask them about it.  Listen to their answers.

They might not give you direct answers at first, but phrasing the questions in different ways would eventually elicit responses.

Questions such as

What motivates you?

What do you like about your job?

What else would you like to be doing?

What are your 3 favorites work projects to do?

I noticed you handled running this project well.  What about the project do you enjoy?

Getting this information about an employee will give you more background on what makes them tick, and what motivates them.

When we observe, ask and listen to our employees:

• We stop trying to figure out what motivates them and let them tell us
• You can approach them in a way which will align with their motivations, especially when you know they need to do things they may not want to do
• There’s leverage to give them rewards or consequences

And maybe then, your employees will be happy!

Multitasking is the ability to do more than one task at a time.  The term originally applied to computers.  Now it’s a common term applied to humans.

Apparently humans are as efficient as computers now!

There are advantages to multitasking when you can do different tasks at the same time successfully.

But there is one task which shouldn’t be done while doing other tasks and yet managers do it all the time.

This task is listening.

When you listen and do something else, the listening suffers.

This might come as a shock to you, but there are people who actually attend meetings, and do other things besides listen while at the meeting.

I know.  It’s shocking.

I’m guessing while none of you do this, you might know someone who does.

Okay, enough sarcasm.

We all have attended meetings where we checked our emails.

Listening suffers.

As managers and leaders, it’s very costly when listening suffers.

When listening suffers, miscommunications happen, trust and productivity goes down, while your stress goes up.

When we view listening as an activity which shouldn’t be multi tasked:

• We recognize the importance of our roles as leaders and managers
• We continue to improve our listening skills thereby increasing our effectiveness
• We might hear what we need without having to ask

Take the time to listen when meeting with your employees.

You’ll find it pays off for them, the company, and especially, you.

I covered the essence of coaching skills, which includes listening more and talking less, asking questions which lead to solutions, avoiding the other person’s stories and sticking to the goals.  This, of course, means you need to have goals (which are SMT – specific, measurable and timely) and knowing what you need when those goals aren’t being met.

Someone in the audience asked what would happen if we used these coaching skills as a sledgehammer instead of a scalpel.

What a great metaphor for motivating with either rewards or consequences!

The intent of using coaching skills is as a scalpel – by helping the other person solve problems by asking them questions, which allows them to figure out solutions while having your support.

But coaching skills could also be used as a sledgehammer.

In order to motivate someone to change there needs to be a reward or a consequence.

If there is a reward, coaching skills as a scalpel could work to motivate.  Asking questions such as what benefits do you see by reaching the goal or what would it fee like to achieve the result can help to entice with reward.

If there is a consequence, coaching skills as a sledgehammer could work to motivate.  Asking questions such as what would be the consequences if the goal isn’t met or what fallout do you see to yourself if you don’t meet the goal can help to entice because of the consequence.

Either way you are asking questions to make the other person more aware.

When we use coaching skills as a scalpel or a sledgehammer:

• We are helping the other person figure things out for themselves
• We are creating an environment where they need to take ownership
• It frees us up from taking responsibility for someone else’s actions

Sometimes we need to tell someone what to do.  But often we will get stronger results when we create the environment which allows them to do it.

Coaching skills helps create this environment.